You Say..

You say
Her smile lights up her eyes
Well, they’re all lies
fed by the desire to confide happiness into everyone else’s vibe,and I find mine imbibed on the pressure of being something
Happy?
I’ve spent years filling the scrappy remains of my heart with half promises and confused I love you’s
this
blackest pain of mine steals my joy and calls its turpentine
blows up my introspection’s
and paints over them with rhymes
lies
and dimes
I find myself shrinking from smiles, flinching at a hug
unable to understand what brought me here
was it my fear of persecution?
not wanting to hear,it was all my fault
that I fell into non favor
and the spirits are out?
you battered me playfully compared to those who vacated me
I smiled once. Then you dissected me
and now I find my self searching
for me
they say your words inspire me while reading my diary
, how can you be so deep?
take a shovel and find out
       -Dig-
~AmaRose
4/30
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